This one goes out to all the Hairstylists for #NationalHairstylistAppreciationDay! Instead of Ricky Martin’s “She Bangs” it’s Young Jeffrey’s “Need Bangs!”
Cuz i’m Tryna’ Get my BUZZ ON!
Follically, Barber’s Got Game,
“Hair Jordan”, That’s her Nick-Name
Like Burger King, she lets you “Have it your way”
Curly top?… Or Wavy?
Says To Me: “This Hair is a Crime!”
Don’t Need a Stylist, You need C-S-I.
Spinning my Chair, cuz She Ain’t sure where to Start,
Is that GUM???… Yeah, Maybe…
Yea she can wield her Shear, Like a Great Kniiiight,
And Make her Chrome Blades Come to Life!
I’ll Let her BRUSH Me Up…
Til she, BLOWS Me Out
SHE CHOPS, WHILE SHE TALKS,
AND SHE TALKS, WHILE SHE CHOPS!
I NEED BANGS, NEED BANGS!
.. Hook Me up with a new, ‘Do (New Do!!)
Want a Haircut that is Classic and Edgy
Something Cool and Crazy
But Still “Acceptable, Professionally”…
She Braids! (she Braids)
Ooo This Lady, She Smooths! (And Smooths)
Wrap Me in a Bib, THAT’S FINE!
Get Your Buzzer out and Gerrymander Me Along my Whole Neck Line,
MAGICALLY, She Knows the ways,
To Turn this 6 Into the ACE of SPADES…
The Way I Look I could Go Model on Top, of a Car,
Gossipy… She Got all the News…
She Dump the DIRT, Like Construction Crews…
Spillin’ the Tea, about her EX-lover Tom
Chop it OFF, So NEATLY…
When the Dandruff Flakes, Fall to my Sides…
It Look like Christmas in July
Until she Scrubs me Up, And she Washes Me Out…
Polish my Lock,
Til their SPOTLESS and SOFT!
With CHAMPAGNE! Oh Dang!
……Sipping on it, while she Soothes My Roots,
…. Feeling Fancy, For the Next Couple Hours
On my Throne, I’m a Queen
My Golden Crown, Dyed Chemically,
And She Banks, on Lengths!
Clippers and a Comb, are Tools! (SHE USE!)
Waft me with the Hot Air-Dryer,
Yea, she GIVE, my Flacid MOP EVEN MORE VOLUME THAN AN AMPLIFIER!.
A Good Hair Day…Means Good Hair LIFE!
…She my HairStyle’s, Ride or Die…
She’ll Tilt my Head Right Up
Then Turn it Back Down,
Got CROCS WITH HER SMOCKS
IN HER SMOCK, SHE WEARS… hahah
….. Yea, Her HANDS! (Have Plans!)
Put her Comb inside a Tube, That’s Blue!
… Part Crustacean, cuz she SNIPS Like a Lobster,
But she TRIMS like a Tree,
And makes me Look… like Rachel Green,
With BANGS! With BANGS!
Got that Justin Bieber Swoop (And Loop)
Crimpin’ with her Texture Iron…
You’ll be Callin’ 9-1-1 on me, Because my Hair is SO DAMN FIRE…